My analysis of the current antisocial behaviour problem and proposed solution
Some people are talented academically, and succeed and do well, some people are talented at kicking a football, and they succeed and get paid even more!
Shouldn’t everyone be able to get by in life for his or her individual talents, and not have to suffer for the fact that they don’t fit into a model created by someone else?
How the problem has occurred.
Life is evolution, everything in life evolves to a higher level and will keep evolving until perfection is obtained, at which point the next stage of evolution can begin.
We have evolved physically from single celled organisms to the most successful species on the planet, humans, our bodies evolved to a satisfactory level to then allow the evolution of our minds.
This allowed us to co-operate in such a way that we could develop a society and an environment in which we would always have food and be safe.
This enabled us to begin focusing on non-life essential activities, such as sport, science, entertainment etc
This enabled us to create great cities, all constructed by us, a concrete world, this gives our world the illusion of being different to that of nature, thus tending to make us forget that we are all animals by nature.
This new society created an economy as a means of acquiring goods, with money being the currency, this meant that humans can no longer live by natural means and have to conform to the rules of the society which they are born into, however these rules are often not suited to everyone, and it appears more so nowadays, at a fundamental level everyone is an individual.
Our society in Britain is based on the fact that you are;
- Raised by two parents.
- Attend education such as school then college and or university.
- Then enter into a job, the amount of money you get depending on the job, usually the better-paid jobs’ requiring higher qualifications.
However the qualification are achieved through attending a school in the early years and being taught basic subjects, which are then advanced on as the child progresses.
Methods have been developed for teaching children, such as classrooms, curriculum etc, and then tests devised to see how well the child has learnt the subject, but these do not take into account factors that were previously unknown when the methods were devised.
These are for example;
- Dyslexia/ADHD/Autism/ learning disabilities
- Childs ignorance, inability to actually see the importance or any reason, ‘why I should need to learn this!’ so this leads to minimal wilful effort.
- Family situation/home life
- Illness e.g. Multiple Sclerosis
Children are human animals, and like all young animals’ young ones, kids have bundles of energy and like to rough and tumble. Sitting in a classroom all day is not natural. These factors combined together can leave a child feeling very restless and left daydreaming about where they would rather be, or something else interesting to them like chatting to their friends about wrestling!
This leads to a lot of children getting poor grades, not because they are of poor intelligence but simply because they have not bothered to learn the subject because it is of no interest to them.
In turn they become labelled worse than other kids, which has the added effect of making the child feel resented.
This method of teaching children to feel worth through academic achievement and encouragement to act individualistically to succeed has lead to a culture of everyone being out for themselves, and thus a belief that everyone else is out to get each other.
This I feel suppresses people ability to be compassionate, and encourages them to go in search of feeling better than one another by whatever method they can,
- For some it means using academic status
- For some it means using wealth
- For some it means using physical talents
- For some it means using appearance
Successful children are then left feeling better than their peers, and unsuccessful children feeling worse. They learn to feel self worth from other peoples opinions.
This means at heart people are never really sure of their worth and have to constantly seek assurance from peers.
Not only are people never happy with what they’ve got, they always want more, but each time they get more, they get used to that amount, so they crave even more the next time.
This leads to such behaviour as attempts to gain appreciation from others’ by looking better than them in any given circumstance.
This often takes the form of insulting each other known as ‘cussing’.
If the person is rich they may cuss the poor,
If the person is good looking they may cuss about appearance etc.
However there is a dynamic which effects who can cuss who, and the consequences of cussing the individual.
Generally speaking, someone will tend to ‘cuss’ another individual if they know they can get away with it, however if the person ‘cusses’ them back better and more, or beats them up, then that person wont try to cuss them again!
People learn whom they can pick on, will pick on them, and give respect to the people who they can’t pick on in hope that they wont be picked on themselves. Often the people who get the most respect are the ones that are most ruthless to others, as this in turn, generates fear and gives the person a reputation, causing others to be wearier of them.
This causes a constant power struggle, and makes qualities such as aggression, violence, and even evilness appear cool, those that go to the extreme being given the most respect.
This is an environment that boys mainly in all boys’ schools experience, although it is not absent from mixed schools. This is where I believe the problem starts, maintaining their status is more important than obeying the teacher in their eyes, and detentions become something to laugh and brag about.
Teachers and parents then label constant offenders as bad, which further enforces in the Childs mind that they are bad.
This does not apply to all children. Others have no trouble learning, some are introverted by nature and have no problems coping with the system,
The ones that devote the most time often are known as ‘geeks’, they are interested in different things to other boys, like computers for example.
The fear of being known as a ‘geek’ discourages a lot of boys who want to look cool from learning because they think being interested in that kind of stuff is ‘geeky’.
The boys that get victimised for being ‘geeks’ or ‘freaks’ have been known to get their revenge by other methods because they are not physically or mentally strong enough to stick up for themselves. They use back door methods such as hacking, and in the most extreme case have been known to kill their fellow classmates after they could take the harassments no more.
The boys that fail the system or that do not do well often do not continue their education when they leave school, rather preferring to get jobs and earn money, messing around for the next few years not realising that this could become what they do for the rest of their lives!
As the jobs do not pay well, and are often boring, a lot of boys are discouraged and turn to other easier methods such as drugs and burglary for example.
The kids that were introverted and that fitted into the system grow up adopting the values of what I will call the passive society, never really questioning, content with their life, these people don’t have too much problem, apart from the ‘geeks’.
The kids that don’t fit into the system, often the extroverted ones, end up taking on what they assume to be the values of villains they aspire to be,
- Lack of compassion or even evilness
- Seeing violence as the solution
The trouble is that the children who are more extroverted often tend to be the ones that are better at fighting and cussing. Therefore a lot of the people who have achieved well academically and who influence the law etc often do not have a clue about the streets and the factors affecting them and thus are unable to see why the current system is not working.
By the time these boys come to leave school, they already have their value system, seeing the law and authority as the enemy, and seeing kindness as a weakness.
This causes some children to develop an attitude, thinking that appearing mean will make the person think they are bad and thus giving respect.
They don’t realise that if no one likes them there wont be any point in having respect.
They dream of being gangsters, and the world of crime becomes even more appealing. However often they don’t realise the reality of what they are doing, often they get a nasty shock, and for some even this is too late.
Children do not just enter school as blank slates; they have been pre-conditioned by their upbringing, which depending on how they were brought up depends on how they act socially.
People from the working class will raise their children to have completely different values, to those in the aristocracy for example.
The working class parents may raise their child to be strong on the streets, but not add much importance to doing academically well.
A middle class family may raise a child to be loving and caring toward fellow peers, but not anything to do with real life situations such as fighting, as they hope this will keeps their kids away from it, this leaves the child unprepared for when a real life situation occurs.
The poor children see the rich as weak and learn that they can scare them,
The rich look down on the poor as pikeys, ensuring the hatred remains.
However in schools the children from the working class are more prepared for the power struggle, children obviously through fear are going to conform to the tough kids, rather than listen to skinny geek saying fighting is bad.
People only like to take advice form another if they respect the other person as knowing what they are talking about, if you are not considered as being tough then no one will listen to you.
Other kids may not become violent, and may say they do not like fighting and that they are a good person, but really they are just scared and as soon as they get the opportunity to beat someone up weaker than them they do,
Not to mention the other methods they use for getting one over one another. People pick up on this and see people that are good as really being weak.
Punishment offers no fear so it doesn’t become a deterrent. The emotional pain of being cussed and losing respect maters much more than the law.
Parents do not encourage disciplining, often taking the Childs side. This apply more so to neighbours for example when one neighbours kids are naughty, the other neighbour tells them off, the parents take their Childs side, the kid thinks it can do what it wants!
‘It takes a whole village to raise a child’.
An underworld has been created where people operate to the rules of their sub-society, this includes moral rules, and increasingly this actually involves having no morals!
People have come to accept beatings and drugs as normal, telling the police is known as ‘grassing’ and being a grass involves losing all your friends and even risk of being beaten up or worse.
People have become afraid to show that they care, and won’t speak out against behaviour they don’t like, sometimes even pretending to laugh and like the behaviour.
The combined overall effect leads to children and young adolescents believing that everyone is out to get them, and that no one cares, they may not be able to see past their estate and think that that’s all there is, they never have any aspirations or a want to better themselves and they feel that they have no hope, which also gives rise to jealousy towards those that are better off.
Teachers that didn’t have problems.
The teachers that gained the best results in terms of behaviour from pupils were the ones that did not take any crap.
If they were strict but mean they would not get any disruption, but everyone would be bored and they would not enjoy learning. However , if they were firm, but respectful to the boys, they often got a much more co-operative class. This applied to the women teachers as well, except if they were mean they still got disruptions as no boys are scared of women.
Boys know who they can test and will push their luck if they can, but if they are not respected they will tend to close up.
Children are humans aswel, they feel equal to adults so often cannot understand for example why they have to be quiet and adults can talk, especially if they are just told, ‘because I said so!’
We must continually remember our connection to nature, at a basic level we are all just DNA trying to replicate, trying to find the best way to survive. Thus being the best is a natural drive to attract the best possible mate to reproduce, our higher intelligence allows us to develop better methods for doing this, but had lead us to forget our roots.
As we further our understanding we must also evolve new more efficient methods based on that greater understanding.
How can we expect children to concentrate on maths if they have still got all the wonders and fear of life around them?
They need to be educated about life so that they are prepared for it. This will enable them to free their minds towards more constructive uses.
A homeless person cannot think about appearance whilst he is still searching for food.
People cannot progress till their lower needs are satisfied.
I propose a system in which children are assessed individually for their strengths and weaknesses, and then from that assessment a decision about what direction they should take, to let them gain the most from who they are.
They will be respected for their individuality, and so therefore will in turn learn to respect others for their individuality.
The system will teach how to live a balanced life known as the ‘middle path’.
I would like to encourage self-education through reading.
The system will teach people relevant to their individual characteristics, but will be engaged in a scheme where they leant to work with people of different abilities, to understand how the differences are needed and to gain an appreciation for them.
Boxing will be used as a means of connecting to the children on a level they all understand; every boy wants to be the hardest and question how those that have more guts them are brave, and those that have guts wonder how those without are scared. Once they have gained respect in that department I feel they may be much more responsive to help in other areas.
There is no where to hide in the boxing ring, people can portray themselves as such and such a person, but all is revealed in the ring. This can make people very humble and open to help.
They will quickly learn about who has true guts and strength.
They will see that boxers are emotional, intellectual and caring people, and will see it is not weak to be so. They will gain confidence and self esteem which in turn will give them something to be happy about. They will learn they need competition to better themselves, they will be shown arrogance blinds them from reality, they will learn self discipline is needed to succeed, they will learn to be the ones who take responsibility for their actions, they will become assertive, learning to face life’s’ challenges rather than hide from them seeing how every challenge is actual there to offer you something.
They will learn true hero’s are the one that get back up, no matter how many times they get knocked down, its easy to be confident when you are on top and have no one to challenge you. They will understand themselves better and hence understand other people better.
You only know who you truly are when you’re scared!
They will learn fear is a natural process for survival, denying fear is like denying life, and is often because the person is scared to admit they feel fear!
True heroes face their fear rather than run, once the fear has become used to it is no longer unknown and therefore loses power.
They will come to understand the boxers code, that you do not take liberties on those weaker and less skilled than yourself, this is because anything you want to show you show it in a ring with a fighter just as talented as yourself, its is better to make it harder for yourself when sparring less skilled opponents, so that you always learn. This will make children think aswel before fronting it.
They will understand that failure is a necessary part of learning, and to accept criticism as much as encouragement if they want to progress.
They will feel more secure to express themselves and show emotion, as none of the other boxers will be able to deny that they feel fear. Which in turn will help with development of compassion for each other and a sub culture of supporting each other.
Their mental toughness will be increased so they will have courage to be true to themselves and not be affected by other people opinions, they will have greater strength in difficult times as they will be used to the fear of being alone.
They will learn assertiveness, but also how to control their aggression and harness it for constructive purposes.
They will learn sticking up for yourself is necessary, but that at the same time truly confident people do not have to prove themselves as they know what their abilities are.
They will learn people respect those who respect themselves and don’t disrespect other people. They will learn other people only take liberties because they allow them to.
They will learn putting yourself first to ensure you don’t let people take advantage of you is necessary, but at the same time taking advantage of other people is not necessary ever.
Their new confidence means they will feel increased levels of happiness, encouraging a social environment.
Morality of boxing.
Questions may be raised over the morality of boxing and or fighting.
If you consider violence wrong because it causes people pain, then it can be looked at like this:
When someone punches you it hurts, and then you feel resentment toward that person towards punching you, and maybe fear they will do it again.
If you fall over and bang your elbow it still hurts, but you probably end up laughing about it. In both cases physical pain was felt but in the first emotional pain and fear was felt aswel.
It is the fact that punching them causes fear and suffering that it is considered bad.
Boxing faces the fear of fighting in the face, boxers need other boxers to fight so they can progress, it is considered bad to not put up a good fight for your opponent because he wants to win a good fight otherwise he has proved nothing.
There is little injury in sparring, full protection is worn and it is supervised properly, More injuries occur in football and rugby.
Both boxers agreeing to fight so there is no emotional anger toward each other, and people often end up becoming better friends than they were before, they gain a mutual respect.
Even if injury is gained, the boxer sometimes likes it because they feel they have been in a ‘real fight’.
The fear has been faced and thus loses power. (I wont say disappears because it never does completely).
It is emotions that cause people to act irrationally beyond logic, emotions are your bodies survival responses, when you enter into them they cut you off from your rational mind which might take too long to consider whether running away is necessary!
Is it therefore not considered as bad causing people direct emotional pain, for example by ‘cussing’ them, which often causes worse emotional pain than being punched. Often people who say they don’t like violence have no hesitation in making fun of others.
People will often treat another badly as long as they think they can get away with it, if they have nothing to fear, often asking politely and being nice just causes the person to think your weak and just laugh at you.
Unfortunately but it is true, a lot of people will not respond to anything other than physical violence, and if some is perpetually winding you up, they wont stop if they know you cant punch them.
This is unfortunately encouraged by our society.
The law can only punish by imprisoning, with longer sentences for worse crimes. Some people even prefer prison as it means they don’t have to do anything.
The human rights legislation means that police cannot harm prisoners, this means that criminals have nothing to fear anymore, seeing the law as just something to fight against, not realising that if it was not for the law the police could just kill them if they wanted to.
Even when physical punishment was allowed there were still criminals.
So this creates a dilemma that has only one outcome, chaos and disorder. The reason is that we are not dealing with the cause of the problem, we are just trying to restrain it.
We obviously can’t use physical violence to punish people, we need to educate people and heighten their awareness, they need to understand that they can only live, because someone else cared and made laws to protect them.
We need to make children understand that being hateful ensures that hate will be returned, and that being loving will inevitably lead to love being received.
We need to educate about what love actually is, and how it doesn’t necessarily always involve pleasure, that we need suffering to learn. They need to understand motivation behind people’s actions, to understand themselves, and they need to understand love for selfish reasons and loving someone for who they are.
They will be taught that it is intention behind the action, not the action itself that considers it good or bad, and this is what is picked up on by other people.
The law does not take into account the fact that it is emotional pain and fear that drives people; they just use their mind to cope in the best way they know how. If people do not understand why they should be self-disciplined, or why it bad to hate, not for other people but simply for themselves, and have no fear of the punishment if anything pride, then the problem will never be solved.
A vital part of this project is educating society as a whole, as well as the children.
People need to understand that in terms of the universe there is no such things as right or wrong, just events that a interpreted differently by different individuals.
People often do not think for themselves, they tend to follow blindly either religions that depend on blind faith, or take other peoples opinions that they deem to be knowledgeable, and in the last case the opinions of the peer group.
We will teach people that they actually decide in their own minds what is good and what is bad. And this differs greatly between cultures, and that just because someone is nice doesn’t mean they are good, often they are too scared to be horrible so that in effect makes them lower than the horrible people. They still have the same thoughts in their heads.
Are people bad just because they stick up for themselves, is it not lower to get people back in indirect ways because you don’t have the guts to do it yourself, for example spreading rumours.
The law cant ban people from insulting each other, yet this is what causes more pain than violence.
It is a fact of nature that people need fear to know their boundaries, but it is a fact that if they feel disrespected or there has been an injustice, they will push back and fight against those who are perceived to be the cause of the injustice.
We need to teach children how to serve themselves to serve the community to serve themselves; if everyone gives to each other then everyone also receives.
We all have the ability to live harmoniously, but we have to learn that to change the world we need to change ourselves.
The only reason this is not so is because children are not educated about the things that really matter.
There is a final point, and that is that people also need to lighten up, people need to learn how to take a joke aswel as how to stick up for themselves, when it is necessary.
I feel that at some level boys and men enjoy fighting and need to get it out of their system, what we don’t need is unnecessary violence and death that don’t have any winners and only losers.
If fighting at worst solves disputes, rather than guns and knives, people will get hurt, but they will learn and LIVE to see another day.
If everyone has an ability to fight it will discourage winning by weapons, and have the added affect of discouraging a fight in the first place as both parties will know the other can fight.
Values will be instilled and people wont have to fear those who do not have as good intention as much, which I hope will give people the strength to uphold value that are true to themselves.